He may think that everything's okay with it too. But is it really?
I wrote a verse
Модератор: zymbronia
- VictorB
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If we started spoon-feeding the author--while he's merrily splashing in a nearby puddle (swimming) pool instead of learning the basics--why has nobody yet commented on the first line:
- VictorB
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LOL!
For what it's worth,
I hate this verse,
not badly rhymed,
But I went blind.
In hell we'll meet by all means, yes,
But you'll be the first one to go there
And wait for me with Satan playing chess.
For how long, I don't really care.
- VictorB
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- acapnotic
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Good to know. Now I need to acquire a gun and go practice on verse makers. I wonder how many shots they can stand. Or how fast they can run for their miserable life. :) Well, if they succeed in the latter, they'll at least have something really exciting to write about. ;)
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In Hell I'll Be in Bad Company
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Don't want to Hell
I live, that's well
I live, that's well
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another /\ersion
dont want to be in hell
for whom the bell...
dont want to be in hell
for whom the bell...
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there is sunshine in the sky
ne/\er tell me... us goodbye
ne/\er tell me... us goodbye
- acapnotic
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Speaking from personal experience? :)
Well, the outcome is definitely unpredictable in my case, since I -- unlike a true poet, probably -- would rather sacrifice meaning for rhyme than the other way around. And since I don't decide which words rhyme and which don't, I don't have too many options.
- Yety
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*There should be an infinitive after want:
Don't want TO Go to hell
**Well is not used as a predicative with the verb to be except for a couple of set expressions All is well (that ends well), (that is all) well and good.
Thus, in this case it should be
That's good or That's swell!
=))
- VictorB
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Well, if you mean that addictable, not addictive, grates on the ear ...
Последний раз редактировалось Aksamitka 18 июл 2021, 21:17, всего редактировалось 1 раз.
Причина: отредактировано по просьбе автора
Причина: отредактировано по просьбе автора
- acapnotic
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No, why? I was talking about myself. The outcome of my 'poetry' is unpredictable (to me, at least) in the sense that the idea it will express depends on the rhyming words available, which is outside my control. I don't have an idea and then look for words that could express it, but rather have the words and look for an idea they could express. Maybe I don't really believe that a poet should go to hell because his verse isn't written well, but what can I do? The language dictates what I say, through its rhymes!
- acapnotic
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VictorB, as for addictable vs. addictive, the former seems to be precisely what you meant. As I see it, it's something you can get addicted to, but not necessarily will. So becoming more addictable only means the risk increases with time. However, the outcome still can't be predicted. It depends. Whereas in the case of addictive you just get more and more addicted as you do it. So in this case the outcome is fairly predictable. Which means 'addictive' would have been the wrong word there, not just the wrong rhyme. :)
- Chaika
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Since y'all are happy making up rhyming words, try these:
Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
https://poets.org/poem/jabberwocky :^)
Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
https://poets.org/poem/jabberwocky :^)