We all are different, aren't we?

Discuss any questions in English. Practise your writing skills.

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Ленья
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#1

Сообщение Ленья »

Let me raise a question of some people’s abilities to deeply investigate an issue in order to get profound expertise in it and their advantages here. I’m one of those guys who would make do with rather superficial knowledge as long as it is sufficient for practical usage. However, there are lots of others who can’t stop digging. From my perspective such people being bogged down in details are prone to missing forest for the trees. On the other hand, how can you attain a remarkably high level of expertise avoiding doing in-depth research? Where do these “professors” come from? Where does their competence derive from? I’ve lately been having second thoughts about my “superficial attitude”. Well, it helps me save my “precious time”, but what is this time for then? Nevertheless, I still can’t help but feel that even if I’d been doing harder it would’ve been to no avail… It seems that all this stuff boils down to your personality type or things like that. Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's.
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#2

Сообщение garans »

I am afraid in our mother tongue we do the same but are unaware of it.
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#3

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

Ленья, are you bemoaning the fact that you aren't prone to obsessive behaviors? :-)
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#4

Сообщение garans »

Ленья пишет: 23 дек 2019, 16:44 Let me raise a question of some people’s abilities to deeply investigate an issue in order to get profound expertise in it and their advantages here.
Everybody has reasons of his own.
I don't feel free enough in English and think that there are ways to improve.
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#5

Сообщение Ленья »

Easy-Breezy English пишет: 23 дек 2019, 19:31 Ленья, are you bemoaning the fact that you aren't prone to obsessive behaviors? :-)
To some extent)). If only we could choose our destiny. I wish I’d been born maniacally preoccupied with an idea of shaking off my obsession.
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#6

Сообщение Ленья »

garans пишет: 23 дек 2019, 20:47 I don't feel free enough in English and think that there are ways to improve
So do I, but we seem to have different perceptions of the matter. What we mean by “ways of improvements” and which level of fluency we consider to be desirable depend on our notions.
The question is how to avoid feeling complacent, to keep working hard but remember that there is only so much time you can afford to allocate.
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#7

Сообщение mustang »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 09:35 o some extent)). If only we could choose our destiny. I wish I’d been born maniacally preoccupied with an idea of shaking off my obsession.
I can’t agree with you, I don’t think that one has got to be born this way to succeed in life. Yes, some of us are more likely to give up when the going gets really tough but it doesn’t automatically mean that you can’t do anything about it.

Your personality type is not by any means set in stone. Of course, you can be genetically predisposed to act in a certain way but there’s a number of external factors that can drastically affect your genetic makeup: the decisions you make, the people you associate with, your lifestyle (healthy eating habits, keeping your stress leves in check and so on and so forth).

I ve recently read a book about an american guy who totally changed his life , turned his life inside out and in the process learnt a great deal about himself. I am talking about David Goggins (you can google his videos or his book “You can’t hurt me” if you want to learn more about his life story).



Personally, I think that his life philosophy cannot be adopted by everyone but all of us can use some of its elements to become a bit stronger , a bit more resilient if you will.

Ps I believe you have to set yourself long-term goals, know exactly what you want to do with your life and just do something every single day (or even every other day) that brings you a step closer to your primary objective. In my personal experience, working yourself into the ground will eventually lead to mental exhaustion. Not to mention that at some point in the future you will be overwhelmed with too much emotional pain since you have set yourself a high bar, you have been working your butt off to get where you want to be but there’s still so MUCH to do. So consistency is a key here, tiny baby steps lead to great things over large time horisons , the sheer volume of work you gotta do to become exceptionally good at something is frightening but it’s doable if you spread it over months, years, decades. In David Goggin's words, you gotta be a patient motherfucker:).
Последний раз редактировалось mustang 24 дек 2019, 10:30, всего редактировалось 1 раз.
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#8

Сообщение acapnotic »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 09:37 to keep working hard
Why do you want to work hard? For what purpose? If for the purpose of getting perfect, it's not going to ever lead you to your goal. So why bother?

It's one thing if you learn something to the last detail because you love it and enjoy dealing with it, and another if you can't be happy until you have learned it to the last detail. In the latter case it's perfectionism. Don't let it deceive you that it's your friend because it wants you to become better. It wants that not because it loves you but because it hates you for your imperfection. It won't hesitate to whip you to death to make you move when you are exhausted. Exactly because it doesn't care for you -- until you are perfect, and this is never going to happen. This relationship is that of master and slave.
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#9

Сообщение Ленья »

mustang пишет: 24 дек 2019, 10:21 I can’t agree with you, I don’t think that one has got to be born this way to succeed in life.
It was a joke) Maybe it didn't appear clear because of my English, rather weird wording.
СпойлерПоказать
Я хотел бы быть рождён одержимым идеей избавиться от своей одержимости
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#10

Сообщение mustang »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 10:31 It was a joke) Maybe it didn't appear clear because of my English, rather weird wording.
I know.:)) I probably should have put this in quotes as well.
On the other hand, how can you attain a remarkably high level of expertise avoiding doing in-depth research? Where do these “professors” come from? Where does their competence derive from? I’ve lately been having second thoughts about my “superficial attitude”. Well, it helps me save my “precious time”, but what is this time for then? Nevertheless, I still can’t help but feel that even if I’d been doing harder it would’ve been to no avail… It seems that all this stuff boils down to your personality type or things like that. Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's.
.
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#11

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

acapnotic пишет: 24 дек 2019, 10:25 This relationship is that of master and slave.
So true! Great analogy!

Perfectionism is for self-haters. People, just do what makes you happy. Unless it happens to be self-hatred. Then I'd probably give it a thought or two. :-)
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#12

Сообщение mustang »

Easy-Breezy English пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:09 People, just do what makes you happy. Unless it happens to be self-hatred. Then I'd probably give it a thought or two. :-)
It's perfectly natural for any human being to want to grow, to evolve into a better version of yourself. What could be better than to live a live of self-exploration? And self-exploration is impossible without putting yourself in difficult situations where you have to face your deamons and understand who the fuck you really are. I now finally undestand why people who seem to have everything that the less fortunate can only dream of take their lives or drink themselves into oblivion. Pleasure is not a road to fulfilment and happiness, struggle is.
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#13

Сообщение Ленья »

acapnotic пишет: 24 дек 2019, 10:25 Why do you want to work hard? For what purpose? If for the purpose of getting perfect, it's not going to ever lead you to your goal. So why bother?
Impeccable logic! As usually) Well, what is a conclusion? What do you suggest we do? Hacuna matata?))))
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#14

Сообщение Ленья »

Easy-Breezy English пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:09 People, just do what makes you happy.
We should tell apart the two kinds of happiness. What makes me happy right now? Definitely that bottle of beer. In an hour? Another bottle, of course. The next day? A sense of satisfaction of the fact that I’ve managed to resist a powerful urge to consume the beer instead of knowledge. Our entire life is a struggle))
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#15

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

mustang пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:45 Pleasure is not a road to fulfilment and happiness, struggle is.
Still the valiant Stormy Petrel proudly wheels among the lightning, o'er the roaring, raging ocean, and his cry resounds exultant, like a prophecy of triumph-
Let it break in all its fury!


:-)
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#16

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:58 Impeccable logic! As usually
acapnotic has a true gift in that regard. I've never seen anything like it.
Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 12:42 Our entire life is a struggle))
If people refuse to do what makes them happy, they should do what makes me happy instead.
So you can mail me all that unused liquor. ))
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#17

Сообщение Ленья »

mustang пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:45 It's perfectly natural for any human being to want to grow, to evolve into a better version of yourself
But how deep are we going to "evolve"?
The particular practical example, what a problem has been puzzling me. Gavenkoa gave the link to one valuable research which I considered to be very useful. However I didn’t even read it up. On the other hand I reaped some benefits from this article. It was enough for me to quickly browse it through to get the main idea, to find the answers I’d been seeking. Furthermore, I noted down a couple of useful expressions. Should I be frustrated?
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#18

Сообщение acapnotic »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 11:58 What do you suggest we do? Hacuna matata?))))
Perfectionism is a bug in our operating system, so it should be fixed. Until then we will continue to suffer from it, whether we want it or not. Unfortunately the advice "don't worry, be happy" doesn't work. If a perfectionist could be happy, he would be already. He can't be happy because deep down he believes that he can and therefore should be perfect and because he sees that he is not. Unhappiness and self-hate are just the logical consequence of this discrepancy.

We can't stop being logical. It is said that even mentally ill people think logically, they simply draw their conclusions from wrong ideas. This idea, that we can be perfect, is also wrong, but we somehow got it into our code, and our processor can't help but execute it. The wrong code has to be removed, and only then its effects will disappear.

Trying to control the effects will lead you nowhere. You will simply see your perfectionism as imperfection, with the same consequences.
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#19

Сообщение garans »

Nobody's perfect. (Kevin Costner, Bodyguard)
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#20

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

Ленья пишет: 24 дек 2019, 13:10 On the other hand I reaped some benefits from this article. It was enough for me to quickly browse it through to get the main idea, to find the answers I’d been seeking.
So... now it's your excellent ability to cut through the bullshit that upsets you? Geez, dude, there's just no pleasing you. :-)
acapnotic пишет: 24 дек 2019, 15:00 He can't be happy
Some people just can't be happy no matter what, and that's the real bug in our system.
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#21

Сообщение acapnotic »

Easy-Breezy English пишет: 24 дек 2019, 22:55 Some people just can't be happy no matter what, and that's the real bug in our system.
If your view of yourself is fantastic and your expectations, therefore, unrealistic, you are bound to be unhappy no matter what. Constant disappointment doesn't get along with happiness.
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#22

Сообщение garans »

I think TS has advanced level of English - quite enough for life and work.
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#23

Сообщение Easy-Breezy English »

acapnotic пишет: 25 дек 2019, 12:54 If your view of yourself is fantastic and your expectations, therefore, unrealistic, you are bound to be unhappy no matter what.
Perfectionists seem to be just the opposite. Deep down they tend to have a piss-poor view of themselves, and they are forever hoping to fix that by clearing yet another bar. It never works, of course, but they seem to be oblivious to the fact and just keep at it. Negative parental programming is all it is.
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#24

Сообщение acapnotic »

Easy-Breezy English пишет: 25 дек 2019, 15:01 Deep down they tend to have a piss-poor view of themselves, and they are forever hoping to fix that by clearing yet another bar.
But you don't have to be perfect to fix yourself. To be as good as everyone, you don't need perfection because nobody is perfect. Why then do they crave perfection and not just improvement?
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#25

Сообщение Michelangelo »

Moreover, how can perfection be measured? Is there any measure to perfection at all?
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