We all are different, aren't we?
Модератор: zymbronia
- Ленья
- Сообщения: 1199
- Зарегистрирован: 01 мар 2018, 14:30
- Благодарил (а): 662 раза
- Поблагодарили: 461 раз
Let me raise a question of some people’s abilities to deeply investigate an issue in order to get profound expertise in it and their advantages here. I’m one of those guys who would make do with rather superficial knowledge as long as it is sufficient for practical usage. However, there are lots of others who can’t stop digging. From my perspective such people being bogged down in details are prone to missing forest for the trees. On the other hand, how can you attain a remarkably high level of expertise avoiding doing in-depth research? Where do these “professors” come from? Where does their competence derive from? I’ve lately been having second thoughts about my “superficial attitude”. Well, it helps me save my “precious time”, but what is this time for then? Nevertheless, I still can’t help but feel that even if I’d been doing harder it would’ve been to no avail… It seems that all this stuff boils down to your personality type or things like that. Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's.
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
Ленья, are you bemoaning the fact that you aren't prone to obsessive behaviors? :-)
- Ленья
- Сообщения: 1199
- Зарегистрирован: 01 мар 2018, 14:30
- Благодарил (а): 662 раза
- Поблагодарили: 461 раз
To some extent)). If only we could choose our destiny. I wish I’d been born maniacally preoccupied with an idea of shaking off my obsession.Easy-Breezy English пишет: ↑23 дек 2019, 19:31 Ленья, are you bemoaning the fact that you aren't prone to obsessive behaviors? :-)
- За это сообщение автора Ленья поблагодарил:
- Easy-Breezy English
- Ленья
- Сообщения: 1199
- Зарегистрирован: 01 мар 2018, 14:30
- Благодарил (а): 662 раза
- Поблагодарили: 461 раз
So do I, but we seem to have different perceptions of the matter. What we mean by “ways of improvements” and which level of fluency we consider to be desirable depend on our notions.
The question is how to avoid feeling complacent, to keep working hard but remember that there is only so much time you can afford to allocate.
-
- Сообщения: 6070
- Зарегистрирован: 23 май 2018, 06:17
- Благодарил (а): 926 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2042 раза
I can’t agree with you, I don’t think that one has got to be born this way to succeed in life. Yes, some of us are more likely to give up when the going gets really tough but it doesn’t automatically mean that you can’t do anything about it.
Your personality type is not by any means set in stone. Of course, you can be genetically predisposed to act in a certain way but there’s a number of external factors that can drastically affect your genetic makeup: the decisions you make, the people you associate with, your lifestyle (healthy eating habits, keeping your stress leves in check and so on and so forth).
I ve recently read a book about an american guy who totally changed his life , turned his life inside out and in the process learnt a great deal about himself. I am talking about David Goggins (you can google his videos or his book “You can’t hurt me” if you want to learn more about his life story).
Personally, I think that his life philosophy cannot be adopted by everyone but all of us can use some of its elements to become a bit stronger , a bit more resilient if you will.
Ps I believe you have to set yourself long-term goals, know exactly what you want to do with your life and just do something every single day (or even every other day) that brings you a step closer to your primary objective. In my personal experience, working yourself into the ground will eventually lead to mental exhaustion. Not to mention that at some point in the future you will be overwhelmed with too much emotional pain since you have set yourself a high bar, you have been working your butt off to get where you want to be but there’s still so MUCH to do. So consistency is a key here, tiny baby steps lead to great things over large time horisons , the sheer volume of work you gotta do to become exceptionally good at something is frightening but it’s doable if you spread it over months, years, decades. In David Goggin's words, you gotta be a patient motherfucker:).
Последний раз редактировалось mustang 24 дек 2019, 10:30, всего редактировалось 1 раз.
- acapnotic
- Сообщения: 3939
- Зарегистрирован: 02 мар 2018, 07:49
- Благодарил (а): 280 раз
- Поблагодарили: 925 раз
Why do you want to work hard? For what purpose? If for the purpose of getting perfect, it's not going to ever lead you to your goal. So why bother?
It's one thing if you learn something to the last detail because you love it and enjoy dealing with it, and another if you can't be happy until you have learned it to the last detail. In the latter case it's perfectionism. Don't let it deceive you that it's your friend because it wants you to become better. It wants that not because it loves you but because it hates you for your imperfection. It won't hesitate to whip you to death to make you move when you are exhausted. Exactly because it doesn't care for you -- until you are perfect, and this is never going to happen. This relationship is that of master and slave.
- За это сообщение автора acapnotic поблагодарил:
- Easy-Breezy English
-
- Сообщения: 6070
- Зарегистрирован: 23 май 2018, 06:17
- Благодарил (а): 926 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2042 раза
I know.:)) I probably should have put this in quotes as well.
.On the other hand, how can you attain a remarkably high level of expertise avoiding doing in-depth research? Where do these “professors” come from? Where does their competence derive from? I’ve lately been having second thoughts about my “superficial attitude”. Well, it helps me save my “precious time”, but what is this time for then? Nevertheless, I still can’t help but feel that even if I’d been doing harder it would’ve been to no avail… It seems that all this stuff boils down to your personality type or things like that. Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's.
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
-
- Сообщения: 6070
- Зарегистрирован: 23 май 2018, 06:17
- Благодарил (а): 926 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2042 раза
It's perfectly natural for any human being to want to grow, to evolve into a better version of yourself. What could be better than to live a live of self-exploration? And self-exploration is impossible without putting yourself in difficult situations where you have to face your deamons and understand who the fuck you really are. I now finally undestand why people who seem to have everything that the less fortunate can only dream of take their lives or drink themselves into oblivion. Pleasure is not a road to fulfilment and happiness, struggle is.Easy-Breezy English пишет: ↑24 дек 2019, 11:09 People, just do what makes you happy. Unless it happens to be self-hatred. Then I'd probably give it a thought or two. :-)
- Ленья
- Сообщения: 1199
- Зарегистрирован: 01 мар 2018, 14:30
- Благодарил (а): 662 раза
- Поблагодарили: 461 раз
We should tell apart the two kinds of happiness. What makes me happy right now? Definitely that bottle of beer. In an hour? Another bottle, of course. The next day? A sense of satisfaction of the fact that I’ve managed to resist a powerful urge to consume the beer instead of knowledge. Our entire life is a struggle))
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
Still the valiant Stormy Petrel proudly wheels among the lightning, o'er the roaring, raging ocean, and his cry resounds exultant, like a prophecy of triumph-
Let it break in all its fury!
:-)
- За это сообщение автора Easy-Breezy English поблагодарил:
- VictorB
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
acapnotic has a true gift in that regard. I've never seen anything like it.
If people refuse to do what makes them happy, they should do what makes me happy instead.
So you can mail me all that unused liquor. ))
- За это сообщение автора Easy-Breezy English поблагодарил:
- Ленья
- Ленья
- Сообщения: 1199
- Зарегистрирован: 01 мар 2018, 14:30
- Благодарил (а): 662 раза
- Поблагодарили: 461 раз
But how deep are we going to "evolve"?
The particular practical example, what a problem has been puzzling me. Gavenkoa gave the link to one valuable research which I considered to be very useful. However I didn’t even read it up. On the other hand I reaped some benefits from this article. It was enough for me to quickly browse it through to get the main idea, to find the answers I’d been seeking. Furthermore, I noted down a couple of useful expressions. Should I be frustrated?
- acapnotic
- Сообщения: 3939
- Зарегистрирован: 02 мар 2018, 07:49
- Благодарил (а): 280 раз
- Поблагодарили: 925 раз
Perfectionism is a bug in our operating system, so it should be fixed. Until then we will continue to suffer from it, whether we want it or not. Unfortunately the advice "don't worry, be happy" doesn't work. If a perfectionist could be happy, he would be already. He can't be happy because deep down he believes that he can and therefore should be perfect and because he sees that he is not. Unhappiness and self-hate are just the logical consequence of this discrepancy.
We can't stop being logical. It is said that even mentally ill people think logically, they simply draw their conclusions from wrong ideas. This idea, that we can be perfect, is also wrong, but we somehow got it into our code, and our processor can't help but execute it. The wrong code has to be removed, and only then its effects will disappear.
Trying to control the effects will lead you nowhere. You will simply see your perfectionism as imperfection, with the same consequences.
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
So... now it's your excellent ability to cut through the bullshit that upsets you? Geez, dude, there's just no pleasing you. :-)
Some people just can't be happy no matter what, and that's the real bug in our system.
- acapnotic
- Сообщения: 3939
- Зарегистрирован: 02 мар 2018, 07:49
- Благодарил (а): 280 раз
- Поблагодарили: 925 раз
If your view of yourself is fantastic and your expectations, therefore, unrealistic, you are bound to be unhappy no matter what. Constant disappointment doesn't get along with happiness.Easy-Breezy English пишет: ↑24 дек 2019, 22:55 Some people just can't be happy no matter what, and that's the real bug in our system.
-
- Сообщения: 4344
- Зарегистрирован: 22 мар 2019, 17:15
- Благодарил (а): 821 раз
- Поблагодарили: 2907 раз
Perfectionists seem to be just the opposite. Deep down they tend to have a piss-poor view of themselves, and they are forever hoping to fix that by clearing yet another bar. It never works, of course, but they seem to be oblivious to the fact and just keep at it. Negative parental programming is all it is.
- acapnotic
- Сообщения: 3939
- Зарегистрирован: 02 мар 2018, 07:49
- Благодарил (а): 280 раз
- Поблагодарили: 925 раз
But you don't have to be perfect to fix yourself. To be as good as everyone, you don't need perfection because nobody is perfect. Why then do they crave perfection and not just improvement?Easy-Breezy English пишет: ↑25 дек 2019, 15:01 Deep down they tend to have a piss-poor view of themselves, and they are forever hoping to fix that by clearing yet another bar.
- Michelangelo
- Сообщения: 4958
- Зарегистрирован: 12 апр 2018, 08:19
- Благодарил (а): 32 раза
- Поблагодарили: 705 раз
Moreover, how can perfection be measured? Is there any measure to perfection at all?